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  • even though they're usually seen right through, plain as day, and make a person look really small, these are excuses that can sometimes get results. the most frequently used one is, i'm guessing, the "i saw you in my dream, i wondered if you were okay" excuse. then there are special days, birthdays chief among them. there's "there was an earthquake over there, are you okay." there's the "i miss you" sent with that drunk courage after a few too many. there's "i saw someone who looks like you somewhere or other, where are you these days." and then there are the apology messages sent like a stand-up guy. these are usually "i acted like a jackass"-themed, get a "don't say that, i'm a big jackass too" in response, and fate weaves its webs all over again.

  • purely because of everyone's never-ending "i saw you in my dream" excuse that's been going on for years, i couldn't even bring myself to text the person i saw in my dreams three nights in a row. come up with a new excuse already. as the people who actually have the dreams, our reputation's been reset to zero because of you.