biologically the crown jewel of the allium cepa family, and evolutionarily a defense genius in the most literal sense of the word. the sulfoxides released when its cells are broken down stimulate our tear glands and make us cry our eyes out with a gas called "propanethial s-oxide" whose name we can't even pronounce; it's actually a chemical warfare agent. the scientific world explains this as a survival strategy the plant developed against herbivores. but alas, behold the strange creature called man: we took this bitter tuber that's been trying to poison us and bring tears to our eyes all throughout evolution, and made it the unshakable foundation of every meal. we're probably the only spec…
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