if a person describes everyone in their life as bad and themselves as innocent, the next bad character at that table is probably going to be you. walking a path with someone who doesn't take responsibility for themselves and always pins the blame on others is no different from throwing a stone into a bottomless well.
the other person getting too absorbed in their phone on a first date is actually one of the biggest red flags. because if they're choosing to escape into the screen instead of being present in that moment, this isn't just a momentary lapse in attention. it seems like a quiet indicator of the value they place on the person across from them too. on a first date a person is a little curious, listens a little, and tries a little to get to know the one across from them. constant notification checking, scrolling, and texting, on the other hand, break this natural flow.